I recall being in a conversation with a gatekeeper once (the sort of âmonosexual is a homophobic term!â âMOGWAI means kinky people count as queer!â âasexuals donât belong in the queer community!â type of asshole) and they said of a fictional character: âHeâs definitely gay.  Totally gay.  Maybe bisexual.  Queer at the very least.â
Thatâs when it clicked for me: Gatekeepers honestly think that any sexuality beyond straight and gay is just Gay Lite. Â Bisexual is half-gay, asexuality is, like, 0.05 percent gay, and just identifying as âqueerâ is a quarter-gay, maybe.
This is why they lose their shit so badly whenever someone thinks a character is bisexual and not gay, why they accuse others of erasing their representation. Â A bisexual is just half a lesbian, so how dare you try and water down our portrayal in the media! Â Asexuals are such Lite Gays that they might as well be straight, so donât you dare take away my representation with your ace headcanons!
Never mind if the source material itself is ambiguous. Â If itâs not gay or lesbian, itâs not real representation. Â If you donât want real representation, youâre siding with the straights.
Itâs such a pathetic and limited way of looking at the world. Â Iâd feel sorry for them if they werenât such jerks.
Some do this in relation to trans headcanons as well. Theyâll go into one hell of a performative outrage against TERFs and other assorted bigoted shits⌠and then have a fucking meltdown when a young trans man on this site says âI headcanon this character as a demisexual trans boyâ. This person got dogpiled by dozens of the usual suspects involved in the most virulent anti a-spec discourse, all of them shouting âsheâs a lesbian!â, âlesbian-only!!!!â The fact that all of this was over headcanons about the goddamn moon in the sky just made me cross myself and go âthese people are the future of the community? I fucking weep for it, then.â Honestly, someone can post all they want about how âTERFs are Badâ. it becomes mere performative drivel when one engages in pretty damned TERFy bullshit in turn.
Also, heâre as example of this particular dogpiling in action re: a bisexual headcanon. Notice, again, the usual suspects involved and the rejection of any headcanon other than gay. But sure, sure, m-spec people and a-spec people and trans and nonbinary and agender people are ~*~totally valid~*~ and other meaningless buzz-words tossed round like candy for placation. Valid until any of the aforementioned groups want to work at seeing themselves represented by identifying with a character and having personal headcanons for a character whose sexuality and gender are never black-on-white stated in a give canon.Â
