enjoloras:

softgrantaire:

The concept of ‘passing’ as a whole is gross, but please don’t judge a trans person for wanting/needing to ‘pass’.

Men can wear dresses, yes. But don’t be rude if a trans man refuses to wear anything even vaguely ‘feminine’.

No, women don’t need to wear skirts every day. But don’t be rude if a trans woman wears nothing but dresses and skirts and heavy, heavy make up.

It’s a dangerous, sick world, and it’s a pity that the societal concept of ‘passing’ is so ingrained in us, but it is. It is deeply ingrained in us. It’s terrible and life threatening, so don’t judge a trans person for adhering to strict gender roles.

This is so important. A trans man dressing very masculine and presenting very masculine is not him adhering to ‘toxic masculinity’ – it’s him trying to survive.

A trans woman wearing dresses, mastering her make-up and shaving her legs is not her ‘perpetuating gender roles’ – it’s her trying to survive.

Or maybe it’s just because they like to present like that! That’s also fine. Or at least, it should be, but society says no.

Cis people get to choose how they want to present – trans people don’t. We’re damned if we do, damned if we don’t. We’re either ‘not really trans’ for not presenting a certain way, or we’re ‘upholding toxic gender roles!’ If we do. We’re trapped in a weird eternal transphobic ‘gotcha!’