me: *slaps my ass loud enough to deafen them* i said how are you
kinda wish i could actually fuck up all my friendships with my actions, shit i can apologise for, instead of this whole thing where it’s literally just my personality. did i do something wrong? no never it’s just me as a being. i really want to hear that i did something wrong next time someone gives up on me just to break the pattern because fuck this just isn’t a fucking coincidence anymore
medusa, trying to turn you to stone, but you accidentally called her “melissa” when you first walked in and now you’re too embarrassed to look at her. “it’s alright” she keeps saying “i get it all the time” but you still won’t look. u don’t even remember the stone thing until later
[image description: a three panel comic of a person with glasses and a lab coat sitting next to a table with a robotic head on it.
In the first panel they are looking at the robot head and saying, “I have finally perfected artificial intelligence.”
In the second panel they have turned around to face the viewer and are saying, “But now I face my greatest challenge.”
In the third panel it has zoomed closer to their face and they have a hand holding the side of their glasses and they are saying, “How do I make it look hot?”]