kinda wish i could actually fuck up all my friendships with my actions, shit i can apologise for, instead of this whole thing where it’s literally just my personality. did i do something wrong? no never it’s just me as a being. i really want to hear that i did something wrong next time someone gives up on me just to break the pattern because fuck this just isn’t a fucking coincidence anymore

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

pudding-gremlin:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

asteamingdumpsterfire:

beowulf22121:

whyisthisreality:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

Me: *is mild-to-moderately inconvenienced*

Me: leaving the womb was a mistake

Me: *is greatly inconvienienced*

Me: this is totally fine, perfectly normal, if its a problem this is my fault haha

Major issue: If I ignore it, it will go away.

Minor inconvenience: *Putting up fists in fighting stance* CHALLENGE ACCEPTED

Major issue: Maybe I can sleep it off.

Minor inconvenience: COME AT ME, BITCH! I WILL SMITE YOU!!

we take on the battles we think we can win

why do you always say the wisest shit on random fucking shitposts??

marketing strategy 

griffinmcelroyspisskink:

lalonde-lesbian:

@turing-tested

[image description: a three panel comic of a person with glasses and a lab coat sitting next to a table with a robotic head on it.

In the first panel they are looking at the robot head and saying, “I have finally perfected artificial intelligence.”

In the second panel they have turned around to face the viewer and are saying, “But now I face my greatest challenge.”

In the third panel it has zoomed closer to their face and they have a hand holding the side of their glasses and they are saying, “How do I make it look hot?”]