Tag: cars

Cars Fanfic Author Problems:

dubvictor:

musicalhell:

havahnagilah:

pixelthenerdcat:

  • “Wait a minute can they even do this they’re freaking cars”
  • You start to write something about ears or hands and then you remember like “…oh wait-”
  • getting anxious about putting human food in a scene so you just say oil to make it less conflicting
  • C A R  H U G S …
  • “THEY’VE GESTURED WITH THEIR TIRES LIKE TEN TIMES ALREADY DO SOMETHING ELSE YOU STUPID VEHICLES LIKE I LOVE YOU BUT PLEASE MAKE IT EASIER FOR ME”
  • unsure about how to make a scene more dynamic cause the characters can really only just sit there talking to each other
  • “IS. LIGHTNING. MCQUEEN. OOC. I SWEAR HE’S OOC IN THIS SCENE”
  • Or, alternatively: “IS ANYONE IN-CHARACTER IN THIS SCENE OH GOD I DON’T KNOW THIS SERIES AT ALL DO I I’M HORRIBLE”
  • “wait do they even have windshield wipers”
  • “how far can they stretch their axles out like arms omg this must read so awkward”
  • when you have to write Mater’s dialogue and you start  to say it out loud in the Larry the Cable Guy voice cause good God how do you write that voice properly (i.e. occasional horrid grammar and/or catchphrases)
  • *incoherent screaming about car anatomy*
  • “Okay would McQueen really cry here no he’d hold it in- but wait a second wouldn’t it be more powerful if he broke down here- alright listen up here-”
  • “OKAY IS IT THE ENGINE OR THE BATTERY THAT’S THE HEART I’M SO CONFUSED AND I’M THE ONE WRITING IT”

i’ve never been more baffled by any single post on this website and i’ve been here for four years

Cars fanfic is a thing which I both somehow knew must exist and at the same time was perfectly happy never acknowledging the existence of.

content-wise, this is the least relatable post i’ve seen in weeks

and yet somehow i feel like i ghostwrote it because op’s frustration at writing is universal

jacksisko:

i have a lot of questions about the cars universe after watching cars 2

1. there’s a car pope, so does that mean there was a car jesus?

2. there’s a separate, sentient car that is the car popemobile. was he created for the car pope? or is he a car that was renovated for the car pope?

3. are cars “born”????

4. cars 2 mentions dinosaurs. were the dinosaurs regular dinosaurs or car dinosaurs?

5. the main plot of cars 2 is about these older cars getting angry bc i guess their parts aren’t being made anymore. is there eugenics in the cars universe i’m?????

6. the cars ride inside airplanes which are also sentient, does this count as vore?

7. i’m still stuck on the car pope tbh