Tag: discourse

thefemaleofspecies:

Stop the belief that misidentifying with a sexual/gender orientation is a “hurdle” or a “setback” in your journey of finding your true identity and instead realize that misidentification is a common consequence of living in a culture where being cis and straight is supposed to be a norm and  access to any information and resources about the existence of non cis and straight identities is quite limited and restricted by one’s peers,institutions etc

Stop blaming and demonizing already marginalized communities for your misidentification when all they did was accept you and provide you a safe space to discuss your experiences and explore your identity.Its not their fault that you didnt feel like you belonged with them.

It’s not bi/pan people’s fault that you identified with their label because of your internalized homophobia

It’s not asexual people’s fault that you identified with their label because of your internalized homophobia

Its not trans/non binary/gender fluid/agender people’s fault that you identified with their label because of your internalized homophobia or your issues with the gender roles imposed on you

Its not lesbian/gay people’s fault that you identified with their label because of your internalized transphobia

There’s nothing wrong with misidentification. There’s nothing wrong with exploring your identity. Hold the cis heternormative society and institutions accountable for your misidentification instead of invalidating the existence of identities which give thousands of people to around the world comfort and solidarity just bc you had a bad experience with them.

aroacepagans:

It continues to be clear as fucking day to me that the main reason we even have those “this character is aroace” “no, this character is lesbian” debates is because people refuse to acknowledge the vast number of shared experiences that lesbians and aroace women have.

I mean seriously:

• Both groups have to deal with straight men who feel entitled to their bodies as well as navigate the expectation that they need to have a husband/boyfriend.
• Both groups have a tendency to dress in a way that actively subverts the male gaze.
•  Lesbians and aroace women share a huge amount of history, including the golden orchid and the spinster movement (see the book: The Spinster and her Enemies).

And that’s just the really obvious stuff. Like there are definitely characters that are canonically lesbian both sexually romanticly,  and there are definitely female character that are canonically aroace (although not very many) and those should be respected for what they are, but female characters that are just heavily queer coded in a “I don’t like men” sort of way, but never actually pursue relationships with women and aren’t given any specific labels to go by could just as easily be of ether identity, or they could be an aro lesbian or an ace lesbian. I don’t really understand how these debates are still happening, just acknowledge that these two identities share some similar experiences and move on.

bihets:

bullgod1997:

bihets:

my problem with the whole ‘mogai hell’ thing is the faux-caring attitude people employ when they talk about it. like they’ll talk about how the ‘mogai community’ is damaging to questioning gay people, or lesbians, or bi people, because it might convince them they’re, like, ‘abroromantic sapphoaesthetic womasexual’ instead of just being a lesbian.

so they’re worried that mogai might cause young lgb people to have internalized homophobia. ok. but then, how do they approach these young people who are identifying as whatever identity they’ve determined is ‘mogai hell’ today? do they show these young people understanding or compassion?

no. they screenshot their blogs to make fun of them, they participate in ‘cringe culture’, they make troll blogs where they jokingly adopt these ‘mogai hell’ identities, and they make frequent mean-spirited jokes about ‘cringey’ 14 year olds calling themselves autochorissexual. so they clearly don’t actually care about young people with internalized homophobia, or they wouldn’t be loudly mocking them like this. they just want to bully people. it’s concern trolling at its finest, and it’s pretty transparent.

I know I just reblogged this but something about it didn’t sit right and now I know what it is.

For some people labels are important. Some people need general labels and some people need more specific microlabels. Both of these are fine and completely valid.

But when people start mocking “mogai hell” not only is that being a piece of shit masquerading as worry about how mogai might cause internalised homophobia, it’s also taking the piss out of lesser known identities.

oh absolutely! my intention wasn’t to say that all mogai identities cause internalized homophobia, but that if that’s what these ‘anti mogai’ discoursers genuinely believed, they’d be showing people with ‘mogai identities’ compassion rather than just bullying them and calling them cringey.

but yeah, what you said is also absolutely true. for a lot of people, having a very specific term to describe your identity is extremely important! so when discoursers automatically default to making fun of someone for using a specific label, they’re hurting those people as well. it’s all just super gross overall tbh

necromatador:

“Aces should have their own separate community, which can work hand in hand with the lgbt+ community”

That’s how

The entire

Lgbt+ community works.

It’s a bunch of separate communities with their own individual issues who come together and work on the issues that overlap and provide support for the other groups on the ones that don’t.

You’re literally telling aces to do exactly what every group of the lgbt+ community has done, and then getting fucking pissed when we’re trying to do that.

space-finally:

Things both bisexuals and asexuals are, appearantly:

1) gay and in denial

2) straight and looking for attention

trans-mom:

I’d much sooner associate with people who don’t know proper terminology and are ignorant of social justice who clearly show a character of love and help than someone who knows all the discourse and vocabulary but has the character of a tire fire, ready to consume and hurt for self gain.