On clown breeding

syntax-forest:

captain-s-mindfang:

PLEASE home breeders!Β 

When you’re breeding your clowns remember that TROUPE STATUS is as important as sex when breeding! Clowns do not have a trueΒ β€˜gender’ the way we consider it, but male and female sexed clowns have one of three mating positions in the troupe.

These positions are

BLANC/JOEY (Joey is the American term) (non-egg bearing)

AUGUSTE (egg bearing)

and

CONTRA-AUGUSTE (promotes hormone facilitation)

Do NOT listen to breeders who tell you that you can breed two auguste clowns or two joeys with a good result. Double august/double joey clown eggs are almost never viable! For best results you want an August and a Joey, preferably with a pair-accepted contra-august!

Also be certain that your clowns have access to a spoon that is large enough to bear the egg!

While wild clowns will often use tiny spoons, as these are easier to forage, these are not efficient for breeding purposes! While carrying the egg, the August will be performing a series of maneuvers to impress the Joey, which are meant to look, comically, as though the egg is nearly being dropped. But mistakes do happen, and if the egg breaks your August will not bear an egg until the next breeding season!

Novelty spoons sold for the purpose of clown-breeding may look whimsical and increase the hilarity of the courtship display, but they decrease your chances for a successful season!

Something like the above spoon should not be used if you plan on a successful breeding, and if you’re not planning to raise young clowns then you shouldn’t be giving your clowns spoons at all! An unsuccessful courtship can cause undue stress on all parties, and no one wants a sad clown!

bluespock:

IT’S πŸ˜©πŸ˜‰ PON FARR πŸ˜›πŸ’¦πŸ‘πŸ† NIGHT 🌚🌝 AT ➑️➑️➑️ THE VULCAN πŸ––πŸ‘½ NIGHTCLUB πŸ˜ŽπŸŽ‰πŸΉπŸŒ™πŸ»πŸ·βœ¨πŸΊπŸΈπŸ’«

missvoltairine:

bisexualpiratequeen:

bisexualpiratequeen:

Once
a boy looked very sadly at me after a little bit of conversation.
β€˜you’re so smart’ he said, β€˜I feel like I couldn’t keep up’. And then he
did that sad boy face where you’re supposed to agree to tone yourself
down. So I said β€˜probably’ and fucked his mate.

some top advice from a slut, here, 90% of the time when some boy looks sad and tells you you’re too β€˜x’ to keep up with it’s a ploy to get you to cut bits off yourself so you can come down to his mediocre level; instead, agree with him and fuck his mate

I am a slut
Wen on a dayte
With Boye who would
Manipulate
I’m not sway’d by
His saddened state-
I say okay
I fuck his mayte