princeofaros:

I saw someone claim you can’t be attracted to nonbinary people because that’s fetishization and I don’t understand that at all. It doesn’t make any sense.

Like, how is it fetishization to have any sort of attraction to any gender except these special two? What makes the two binary genders so special that attraction to them isn’t fetishizing them and is perfectly okay? Either it’s okay to be attracted to any gender specifically or all gender based attraction is fetishization.

Also, in these discussions, everyone focuses on nonbinary people (whom it’s okay for them to be attracted to other nonbinary people) and cis people, but where do binary trans men and women fit into this?

Also, it always centers around cis bi people being attracted to nonbinary people for some reason, and it’s always focused on how that bi person is not actually bi but straight and a chaser. No one mentions the cis bi guy who’s attracted to men and nonbinary people but not women. Nor the trans bi guy who’s into men, women, and nonbinary people. Is anyone else smelling hints of biphobia in this?

If you’re attracted to someone, then find out they’re nonbinary, and they’re not aligned with any gender at all, and you’re still attracted to them, is that a fetish?

None of it makes any sense, can someone explain this shit to the binary trans man who’s bi and attracted to men, women, and nonbinary people?

I looked up frostgender and I am very confused. Can you explain it?

biidkyloren:

harleyismyhero:

clitcheese:

I’m actually not sure.

It became a thing in about 2014 when truscum discourse was at it’s peak (your basic anti-nonbinary, only 2 genders, trans is a mental illness type bullshit that we’re still seeing today), and at the same time, the otherkin community was first starting to be visible and was under attack by trolls. I remember 4chan had multiple attempts to take over the otherkin tags with gore and porn. and otherkin had to change their tags about 4 or 5 times in a few months to keep in hiding

so with these both happening at once, a really effective tactic they found was to purposefully confuse the two communities. pretending that people being trans is anything like identifying as something magical. things like frostgender and dragongender and cupcakegender came up, there was a lot of troll blogs coming up saying they identify as a food item, or random household objects, or things that were only funny because they’re hyper specific. one really embarrassing troll blog claimed to be a specific crumb that fell into Abraham Lincoln’s​ beard at some point in history.

and Reddit had tumblrinaction, which was really bad at the time. all the troll blogs made up by redditors would get shared on Reddit, who would then take it seriously and think, holy shit are otherkin really this embarrassing? which would inspire them to go harass otherkin and nonbinary kids on anon, and posting gore in the tags and stuff like that, and then make their own fake blogs to share on Reddit about how bad otherkin are. it was a really gross cycle. people laughing at troll blogs because they assumed all the troll blogs were authentic, it was really the definition of a circlejerk

so. about frostgender specifically. i have no idea if a single real person has ever actually identified with it because it came into being at that time. i’m sure it was to make fun of other abstract genders like voidgender and spacegender, which from what i hear are still common in some nonbinary circles? someone who uses them could probably explain it better. there was a big, big pushback against specific genders, like, people were coming up with new names for their experiences and then got mocked because “only one person is this gender, so how could it possibly be real?”

remember that, really every gender is abstract. they’re either an abstraction built up by the patriarchy like Man and Woman or they’re an abstraction you make for yourself. i think a lot of the pushback was a lot of people’s anxieties that gender had to be based in something “real”, even though i don’t really know /why/ i’m trans and no person can really explain their gender with empirical evidence. I can’t take my gender out of me and show it to everyone in the room​

(quick aside, even TERFs still tend to describe cis-womanhood as something vaguely sacred and holy to them, as if all women are connected by “feminine energy” or “shared girlhood”, often talking about how women are the intrinsically Nurturing gender. even if they can assign vaginas to their very abstract beliefs, they’re still not really evidence-based, u get me. Terfism took a lot from those old, radical feminist wiccan cults. are they still around? does anyone know?)

it’s important to know that, the otherkin community from what I’ve seen is really respectful and has never claimed to be anything like trans. also, i’ve only met otherkin who are also trans so far? don’t ask me to explain how. but i know that, there was never any confusion as to wether otherkin is a trans thing or not until all this happened. i know a lot of trans people still treat otherkin with suspicion for a lot of things like, making trans people look “crazy” by association. all the made up genders was actually a really effective tactic and, well Otherkin is still just a huge cringe thing 3 years later and that might not end for a long time.

so yeah. i really just used frostgender as shorthand for those rare, uncommon nonbinary identities that very few or no one outside trans communities would believe are real. to say that people aren’t really going to trust in people’s individual identities if they aren’t backed up by something like 2 thousand of years of cis-sexism, for example

Hey! So I’m on mobile rn and can’t provide any handy links at the minute, but basically what you’re talking about is known as xenogenders, which are a subcategory of nonbinary genders, and they are very much a thing! I’m not sure if frostgender is one or not, cuz there’s a lot of then and I can’t remember them all, but probably.

A lot of xenogenders are related to being otherkin or neurodivergent, but not all of them.

A lot of xenogenders are related to concepts or nature, like stargender or cryptogender

And yea, xenogenders tend to get even more backlash than more well-known nb genders, especially ones that very few people id with, but that doesn’t make it any less real (or gender in general any less made up, depending on how you look at it I guess)

Also the Wiccans you’re thinking of are called Dianics

Pocket Gendered is also a good term for when less than like, eight or so people identify with a specific gender label! (such as most of mine are)

shootmeadub:

stop trivializing racial/gender/sexuality discourse as a social media “thing” that doesn’t exist off the Internet just because you can’t/won’t read books that have talked about this shit literally for decades

thislesbianthatlesbian:

thislesbianthatlesbian:

if you’re a trans lesbian and you’re reading this, you deserve the world. twerfs are gross and you are 100% a woman-born-woman, and a lesbian. nothing about you is male. you’re a woman, and you belong in the lesbian community. no twerf can change that fact.

-mod key

btw this is a post that you are welcome to reblog even if you aren’t a lesbian!! please reblog!!

“mogai tumblr made it hard to figure out my gender/sexuality when first coming out”

consider: You don’t have to have a vendetta against queers with the “weird” genders and sexualities, especially teenagers, because you used to consider yourself one of them

also consider: the answer to “my identity was hard to figure out” is not to make it harder for other people. erasing other people’s identities will not make your own more visible. MOGAI people actually quite often find it helpful to have words for their identities, like yourself, and everyone else in the world

also consider: your anger is misdirected. heteronormativity hurt you several billion times more than the split attraction model ever could. No one who IDs as frostgender has the social capital to gaslight and coerce children from birth into a gender. straight and cis people are 100% to blame for the shame we’re made to feel for our identities and placing blame on young queers achieves nothing but furthering that shame. there is no good political goal that can be achieved by bullying mogais you nasty fucks

trans-mom:

cyanide-and-razorblades:

trans-mom:

Things I’ve gotten tired of explaining over the past six years, *cheerleader voice* readyyyy?? Ok!

-Cis isn’t an acronym.
-Trans isn’t short for “transition.”
-Transition doesn’t strictly only mean hormones and surgeries, there’s more to it than that.
-Medical transition is incredibly costly, even in places where the healthcare is free*.
-Trans people self medicating hrt is a sign that the medical systems around the world are horrid towards trans people, don’t be assholes to them.
-Cis people can’t be “truscum,” the literal definition of “truscum” involves being “transsexual.” Cis people are just transphobic.
-Don’t describe others as mtf/ftm. Just don’t.
-“transtrender” is transphobic.

Not all cis people are transphobic or homophobic or anything of the sort.

My post doesn’t say that or anything related to it. Please don’t curtail my post over irrelevance.

why the fuck would you add that kind of comment from a depression &self harm blog?