Reminder that âcompulsory heterosexualityâ as a term was coined by
Adrienne
Rich, a contributor to the infamous TERF book The Transsexual Empire.
Wait how is compulsory heterosexuality a terf thing. Iâve never heard that ? (Iâve barely heard anything about the term in general though so.)
The informal concept that we are all compelled by society to be heterosexual is real and important. But the phrase/language use of âcompulsory heterosexualityâ was coined or at least popularized by Adrienne Rich in her essay Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence, which was extremely sex-essentialist and included stuff like⌠a mother nursing her female child as a lesbian experience. Or a nurse caring for a female elder a lesbian experience. Even if not all lesbian experiences are sexual, thatâs kind of getting into a sketchy area (is caring for a male child âstraight?â is a latina or black nanny caring for a white girl baby having a âlesbianâ experience?) that is questionable at best.
the experience that all people are conditioned by a heterosexual society to be straight and see straightness as success and a default, is realâ this post is not intended to remove that concept from anybody or âtake awayâ the right to express that concept in language. Lesbians experience it in a unique way, and almost all over lgbqa+ women (and others!) experience it in different unique ways. Its important. we gotta talk about it.
itâs just that this language as it was solidified, was done so by someone who did not think bisexuality, pansexuality, asexuality, were valid. And it was done so by someone who did not think that trans women were women, or that nonbinary dfab people were anything but cis women, or that trans men were anything but women. Thatâs what anon means when they say âit was never meant for the rest of us.â Many posts that are about âidentifying compulsory heterosexualityâ are posts that contain a lot of bi, pan, ace, trans, nonbinary, and other experiences as brainwashing and not as nuanced stores told by diverse people.
(which is not to say that a lesbian canât have experiences where a heterosexual society tried to use bisexual and other categories as weapons or tools to keep them open to including men. Weâre furious about that too.)
incidentally, TERFs would really love it if being a terf was synonymous with âlesbian experience.â They have been trying to make that a reality for years. One of the ways they do so is popularize their language and references to their literature as I-thought-it-meants and get newcomers to lgbtqa+ community to use them and accept them.  It can be really disappointing to find out that what seemed like useful language was coined in a context that is exterminatory of others but Iâm sure that moving forward alternatives can be found that donât include contributors to The Transsexual Empire.
last time i asked, someone told me that itâs been suggested (so idk how widespread the use is yet) that we use âcoercive heterosexualityâ for a non-terfy version of the concept
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âThat episode where an alternate version of Janeway sacrifices herself for the other Janewayâs crewâ doesnât even narrow it down to one Voyager episode.Â
you know what i think cis people, and especially lgb cis people, rely too much on people validating their romantic revulsion to trans people. like iâve never met an lgb trans person who wasnât asked âwhat do you think of gay people who arenât willing to date you because of your transition status/agab/etcâ and itâs the emotional labor weâre forced to carry to just say âno i donât think youâre an evil cis gay for not being attracted to me, itâs within your right to have boundariesâ an whatnot lest we be The Evil Transes Who Will Rape You.
like is it not enough to just reject us and go? can you just be satisfied in the knowledge that, yes you are rejecting us because weâre trans, but youâre gonna leave us with enough dignity to not say thatâs why. we already know our attractiveness is in a permanent state of âup for debateâ can you at least do this the simple courtesy of shutting up about it?
thank you to all the cis lesbians reblogging this but i still see almost no cis men reblogging it
âItâs bad to have robots and dragonfolk and half-angels as standard playable races in your RPG, because they impose a bunch of specific assumptions on peopleâs homebrew settings. Unlike Tolkien-style elves, dwaves and hobbits, which are perfectly generic and encode no setting assumptions whatsoever.â
And itâs not just the Tolkien stuff, either. There are people who will argue with a straight face that allowing players even the option of being, like, psychic werewolves or whatever represents an attempt to dictate to GMs how to run their games, but theyâre perfectly okay the very same rulebook assuming that every single setting it could possibly be played in must include a subterranean empire of spider-worshiping David Bowie expies with goofy darkness powers because that in particular is a standard player character background. Like, do you not get that the latter is just as weirdly specific as the former?
what does ânb people are almost always binary alignedâ even mean?Â
âoh they wear make up so theyâre woman alignedâÂ
âoh they grow their facial hair so theyâre man alignedâ
like what type of cisnormative gender role bullshitâŚâŚâŚ in 2017????? bitchâŚ
*abled bodied voice*: omg⌠honestly its so hard on ME watching disabled people be⌠disabled, it rly makes ME feel so bad⌠u know i saw a disabled person on the street yesrerday⌠and i⌠didnt even harrass them!!1 where is my medal????? do you know how hard I tryâŚ.
youâre all like âi love trans women!â but how many of you have actually loved a trans woman. you all want to play at supporting us but how many of you actually want to understand us. do you have any close trans woman friends? like actually close. like important enough to you youâd be willing to lose cis friends defending them. do you hang out with trans women outside of activist spaces? outside of tumblr? in group discussions when you hear a trans woman speak, do you tense up? if a trans woman says something you have to think about for more than 5 seconds do you do that work? or do you immediately reject and ignore it. if a trans woman disagrees with every other person you know does it ever cross your mind that everyone else might be wrong? when a trans woman asks for financial assistance on tumblr and you know you have that money to spare, do you help her? if youâre broke, and she just asks you to reblog her post, do you reblog it? or do you just scroll past and pretend you didnât see it.
âsupport trans womenâ is a lie meant to make you feel good. you cannot support trans women. you can only support A trans woman, and then do that over and over again with every trans woman you meet.
Yeah this tbh
saying âyou are a burden on societyâ is just such a weird framing of priorities
Itâs like saying âwow, think how much better gas mileage your car would get if you werenât sitting in itâ or âthink how dry that umbrella would be if you werenât holding it in between you and the rainstormâ.
the things we create? theyâre for us. they are meant to carry us. they are meant to protect us. we are meant to hold them up to keep us dry.Â
why do we even have a society if not to take care of each other?
ideal doctor who s11
paul mcgann writes & is showrunner. the thirteenth doctor, is also played by paul mcgann, and bill stays as companion. the master regenerates into a younger cgi version of paul mcgann. paul mcgann is everywhere.
bill nd heather holding hands in the tardis and holding hands forever and brushing knees when they sit and hugging as often as they can and touching in any way as often as they can to reassure bill sheâs not entrapped in cyberman casing, that she can feel skin against hers, that sheâs alive,,
why must u hurt me..,..,..,,, i luv them..,.,,.,
