Want to stop trans murders?
Stop shaming men who like us, stop calling them gay when they’re not, stop watching dudes play us on screen.
Yes, it’s actually a deeply complicated and nearly intractable set of issues at the dangerous intersection of race, class, homophobia, misogyny, and economics, but the thing that most people can DO, right now, no matter who or where they are, is really that simple: stop shaming the men who like us, stop letting us be portrayed by men.
After years of thinking on this issue, listening to survivors of assault, reading the reports, talking to countless trans women/sex workers, that’s the heart of this. Straight men kill trans women partners because other people, and culture as a whole, says it’s gay, less masculine, to be with us.
So shut it down. Shut down every person or conversation that claims trans women are “really” men, every media depiction with men playing us.
If y’all have other ideas, I’d love to hear them. I’ve seen endless “stop trans murders” posts but no suggestions as to how, or any accountability.
Exactly! There should be no excuses for crossdressing. It is bad if you use it to cope, it is bad if you have DID, it is bad when you are intersex, it is bad when you are a transman! Call people out, and do not be afraid to lose friends!
to be fair, DID sounds like a valid reason if u have an alter who is a woman. and using it to cope is a really, really vague statement because most people consider trans women ‘crossdressing to cope’ and i feel like it could backfire on us pretty badly. i also definitely don’t feel qualified on intersex issues to make a statement on that bit too.
i also feel like i need to make it really clear that, drag should be separated from simply dressing femme and wearing dresses. i know trans guys and cis guys who wear pink, dresses and makeup and lingerie and aren’t ever really dressing up as women. because they’re men who like cute clothes.
like, i do hate drag more than anything. because that treats womanhood and trans identities as a costume, and is always meant for humour and entertainment at our expense (and drag performance more than often relies on mocking black women specifically for humour). I just don’t want nonbinary people and men to be told they can’t wear “women’s clothes” or feminine things to look and feel good, when the majority of the harm comes entirely from intent. especially remembering that trans people have been fighting for clothes to be ungendered for as long as i can remember.
there’s just a huge difference between dressing up and being yourself, and wearing someone else’s life as a costume, and treating violence against us as a joke. because one is leading to trans murders and one is leading to people being cute and having better self esteem.
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