Tag: mine

can u imagine being the kind of person who looks at photos of a pride march and who’s first reaction is to check if there’s any evidence of asexual people existing there

like option a, there’s ace people at pride, being proud. you have no idea if anyone there is het or cis or otherwise LGBTI. you’re mad at someone being proud of being ace with no other information about them.

this is what people mean when they say that exclusionism is hurting LGBTI aces. If they can’t proudly be ace, even comfortably mention being ace inside the LGBTI community, then we take away their only safe spaces

and like, option b, there isn’t​ anyone being proudly ace at pride and you get to pat yourselves on the back for doing such a good job protecting LGBTI people from…. having to see an ace be proud of themselves. that’s a bit too toxic for my liking tbh

clitcheese:

clitcheese:

callout post for myself, @clitcheese 

  • has had consensual sex without first disclosing that they are possibly on the aro spectrum somewhere
  • cishet ace
  • has clitoris in their url, quite possibly a terf
  • no really, exclusionists have said both those last ones to me
  • when i had trans lesbian in my bio
  • i’m a Very Allo Lesbian guys i’m not even ace
  • can i make it any more clear that i’m a lesbian who feels sexual attraction. i have the sexual desire to fuck girls and nonbinary people. do i need to say im allo in my bio or something so people stop assuming i’m Not A Real LGBT
  • also doesn’t tag the Q slur :/

i have a terf criticising me as a header image. if u can’t even,, be bothered to hover ur mouse over my url then you should give up on the Discourse tbh

like………. it’s the word clit. my url is in protest of terfs trying to claim a monopoly on the clitoris. i am a trans girl w a clit, lads
#reciepts

@patrexes said: 

but see if u say ur allo then ur ~weirdly and uncomfortably preoccupied by ace ppl and acephobia~

I’m even oversexualising myself, and uncomfortably insinuating that my sexual desires are inherently sexual. gosh

there is one valid criticism about the term allo is that, conceptualising romantic or sexual attraction as a binary thing where you either have it completely or not at all is completely flawed

the thing is though… ace and aro people aren’t pushing it as a binary at all. it’s aphobes who are doing that damage.

I’m hearing shit like, ‘everyone’s a little bit demi, so why even have a word for it?’ pretty much constantly. actual ace-spec people aren’t the ones saying grey-aces are confused and need to pick a side.

a lot of exclusionists say, actually by /your standards/, (our horrible mogai standards), i’d be ace spectrum, but i choose not to use the label because calling myself ace is #problematic, or i’d be ace spectrum but I don’t like microlabels so i refuse to use one.

they’re actively shunning all the microlabels that are amazingly useful in breaking down the idea of an ace/allo binary. they’re shunning any orientation that doesn’t fit into those two categories and calling it progress

some of them are #cringing at the very idea that it is a spectrum, saying oh god mogais, not everything has to be a spectrum! when the first complaint was that aces and aros… weren’t allowing for a spectrum and were slotting people into the allo category by default

and that post that went round, that said being ace = good, calling yourself ace = bad. that’s the kind of shit that haunts me when i sit down to think about labelling my attraction. and the idea that a teenager IDing as ace is sexualising their peers, because the existence of a single ace kid automatically labels everyone else in their school as allo. somehow. which is the most amazingly black and white thinking i’ve seen in my life. people aren’t saying ‘i’m ace compared to all the dirty sexhavers around me’, they’re just saying they’re ace. ace in relation to nothing but themselves. and aphobes have called that a #pedophile grooming tactic.

i have no idea what my romantic orientation is, i have no idea at all if i’m alloromantic, or to what degree my mental illness even clouds the whole concept of romance. but i have felt no pressure at all from ace and aro people to pick a side, i haven’t been labelled alloromo by anyone against my will. I haven’t heard ‘you’re either with us or against us’ from anyone on this side. it’s pretty much just aphobes pulling this crap

and if i ever do pick a romantic orientation, im damn sure the only thing that fits is going to be the most obscure microlabel on the planet. and i’m still going to be a gay girl as well. and i don’t feel like i can even pick one until this godawful discourse is finally over and microlabels stop being this ultimate enemy people are making them up to be… they’re words people are using to describe themselves. I really can’t, comprehend the psychology involved in being against people having words that fit them

clitcheese:

callout post for myself, @clitcheese 

  • has had consensual sex without first disclosing that they are possibly on the aro spectrum somewhere
  • cishet ace
  • has clitoris in their url, quite possibly a terf
  • no really, exclusionists have said both those last ones to me
  • when i had trans lesbian in my bio
  • i’m a Very Allo Lesbian guys i’m not even ace
  • can i make it any more clear that i’m a lesbian who feels sexual attraction. i have the sexual desire to fuck girls and nonbinary people. do i need to say im allo in my bio or something so people stop assuming i’m Not A Real LGBT
  • also doesn’t tag the Q slur :/

i have a terf criticising me as a header image. if u can’t even,, be bothered to hover ur mouse over my url then you should give up on the Discourse tbh

like………. it’s the word clit. my url is in protest of terfs trying to claim a monopoly on the clitoris. i am a trans girl w a clit, lads
#reciepts

callout post for myself, @clitcheese 

  • has had consensual sex without first disclosing that they are possibly on the aro spectrum somewhere
  • cishet ace
  • has clitoris in their url, quite possibly a terf
  • no really, exclusionists have said both those last ones to me
  • when i had trans lesbian in my bio
  • i’m a Very Allo Lesbian guys i’m not even ace
  • can i make it any more clear that i’m a lesbian who feels sexual attraction. i have the sexual desire to fuck girls and nonbinary people. do i need to say im allo in my bio or something so people stop assuming i’m Not A Real LGBT
  • also doesn’t tag the Q slur :/

clitcheese:

clitcheese:

terfs have picked up the rhetoric that the AIDS crisis was /The/ defining moment for the community, and that’s why there’s absolutely no room for ace or aro people in the LGB community, because they weren’t at risk. let that sink in for a moment. The LGB community.

they’re erasing the fact trans women, most especially trans women of colour and sex workers, are still the highest-risk group for HIV.

i’m done. TWERFs can die. SWERFs who want to eradicate sex work before eradicating poverty can die. Ace ‘exclusionists’ giving them more ideas on how to exclude trans women can delete your shit sideblogs now and think real hard about what you’re doing, thanks

Also, a short list of reasons TERFs absolutely love reframing LGBT as SGA:

– it’s framing bi and pan people as a burden on the resources of the True SGAs.
– It frames bi people’s belonging as conditional, they can belong so long as they’re not dating the opposite gender.
– This is what TERFs have been trying to do to bi women forever, framing all sex with men as rape and bi women as gullible idiots who need to become a Properly Gay for their own safety
– it’s framing trans people as hitching a ride onto the SGA community.
– it’s framing straight trans people as the Privileged Invaders.
– It erases the sexualities of nonbinary people without same or similar genders, because they mustn’t really exist, right. if anything, they’re anomalies who don’t really belong.

Reframing the root cause of our oppression as SGA, instead of our /actual identities as an oppressed class/, is completely in line with what TERFs have been doing since the 70s, you gullible fucks. you can write ‘No TERFs’ on your blog as much as you like but it doesn’t stop them reblogging your posts. You need to block each one on sight. TERF blogs are still full of your rhetoric. Stop feeding the monsters.

if TERFs have reblogged your aphobe posts, message them to delete it, publically call them out, spam them, shame them. and if you feel the need to write more posts about excluding aces, think ‘could this idea also be used against trans women, bi people or nonbinary people?’ because it usually will.

@protectlgbtkids​ the short version is yes. If TERFs agree with something you say then that’s a damn solid reason to sit back and reconsider your stance.

As clearly as I can explain this: The idea that there is a Spectre of very privileged, abusive people wanting to creep into the LGBTI/Queer community has never benefited anyone but TERFs and abusers. That spectre has always had a changing face, and at various points in our history it’s looked like aces, aros, bis, pans, trans women ofc, nonbinaries with *sparkly* genders, nonbinaries with complicated genders, nondysphoric trans people, straight trans people, trans people as a whole, the MOGAIs, people who use the split attraction model. all of these groups have had Big Discourses against them in the last few years, All of them groups explicitly hated by TERFs especially. 

peak TERFs will even say the exact same about cis gay men: that they’re abusers, creeps, bringing misogyny into their precious LG community. This is to illustrate the level of Fucked Up we’re dealing with here, they think homophobia doesn’t matter if you have male privilege.

I know that this isn’t a thing anyone outside hardcore TERFs actually believes, and i’m sure as fuck not saying i think exclusionists believe this. but exclusionism does strengthen TERF arguments. say like, if we decide that there shouldn’t be an A at the end of LGBTIA, because aces can be cishet, that means TERFs are justified when they say that we should kick out other groups for being too privileged. As i said, that’s everyone. TERFs define oppression structures so that they’re at the very bottom. here’s a good post by queeranarchism that explains what exclusionists are doing: creating such an Us vs the Cishets mentality that it can be used to justify toxic behaviour. This is, funnily enough, exactly how TERFs have operated since Day 1. TERFs thrive on the idea that excluding people will make a safer space. They posit men, bi women, trans women, aces and anyone who has politics they don’t like (read: mogai and Queer) as people making the world unsafe for young cis lesbians. That’s why every time you make the basic argument that “X group is privileged and undeserving of resources/community/having a voice”, it will always strengthen their arguments.

like. if you want to prove to me that TERFs don’t fucking love exclusionist arguements, go ahead. like, if you find a second inclusionist TERF other than uninucleus i might actually seriously reconsider my stance. but like, every TERF blog i’ve seen in about a year has had shit mocking ace people on their blog. there’s blocklists going around with hundreds and hundreds of TERFs on the exclusionist side, so like, you must understand on some level that this is a problem.

anyway, just from my terf tag, here’s a terf saying trans people are as bad for the community as cishet aces  

and here’s a much better masterpost of how excursionist rhetoric strengthens TERFs, including TERFs straight up thinking exclusionist posts were meant to be about trans women, and TERFs recruiting aphobes. so… TLDR exclusionism is gross even as a concept and your side has done absolutely nothing to stop from being co-opted and used by TERFs :/